Pyro...
I only returned to my internet acces today, and read all the posts pertaining to your situation. I wish to offer you my condolences, as no matter what anyone may say, no life is "throw-away".
Not to long ago I had a corn escape. He was a gorgeous creamsicle named Thorne. I only had him a few weeks, but was very attached to him as creams are my absolute favorites, and I had not had the opportunity to own one for the first year or so that I was keeping corns (there aren't many breeders in my area).
Anyway, he escaped on me about 6 weeks into my owning him and I was terribly upset. I tore my house apart at least 5 times over the next month, and did smaller scale searches for him every day, I have cats, very nerve racking. Almost every week for the first three months, I went ahead and bought food for him and left it out in a makeshift trap, hoping to lure him out and have my little guy back with me again, but never had any luck. After a while, I slacked off in my efforts, assuming that he had gotten outside somehow and hoping that maybe I'd find him in the yard basking one day.
This weekend, my wife and I were expecting some out of town company, and I decided to clean out the pull out sofa-bed and put some sheets on it, knowing I'd be needing it later. My wife was helping me and as I pulled the old sheets off the bed she gasped, and immediately started to cry (she loves the snakes almost as much as I do). We had found Thorne. Apparantly he had wedged himself into the folded mattress somehow, and was either killed when someone sat down, or just didn't have the strength (he hadn't eaten in weeks by the time he died).
I suppose the moral of this story is twofold Pyro. 1) Learn from mistakes, don't ever give up on something that you love, it was obvious from your posts that you cared for your pet, and I see no reason that you shouldn't try again, perhaps when you have a few more resources at your disposal.
and 2) No life is disposable. No matter what anyone may tell you, don't ever let go of your caring. I've lost two corns now, and the next person who says to me "It's just a snake" or "The only good snake is a dead snake" or "It's not like its a dog or anything" might just get told off. They are my pets, I interact with them and I care for them.
I know that other post got kind of harsh, but please understand it for what it is, people caring, just like you do. Don't be discouraged, just have a better understanding of your limitations, and make sure you can overcome them before trying again.
I'll shut up now. Just never forget the way you loved that "disposable pet", and you'll be just fine.
JCD