ratsncorns
Bird Nerd
NICE one night stand, I couldnt resist that either LOL
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World's Most Gorgeous Men~~ Come on Girls Help Me Out!!
- Thread starter sinisterserpents1
- Start date
RobbiesCornField
Bring it on.
...................................................................... :eek1: :bowdown:
WELL! Since we're all posting ONS's... here's two different previous ones of mine.
(The one with the scruff looks MUCH better IRL).I'd add a few more, but... not exactly all of the pics are family forum safe. :grin01:
EDIT: One pic removed due to questionable content.
Attachments
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desertanimal
2003 UB313
Not to be a prude, but I don't think the one on the left that you've already posted is.
RobbiesCornField
Bring it on.
Taking it down now, just in case.
diamondlil
Mice! They taste so nice!
I'm still going to thank you for posting it!:grin01:
RobbiesCornField
Bring it on.
I'll put that in a private gallery. Meaning anyone who's overly curious can PM me, and I'll just send it to them that way. :grin01:
desertanimal
2003 UB313
Thanks. I appreciate it. I feel we have to toe the line more carefully than others might, as we are probably less likely to get collegial room granted us than others might. Not saying that's for sure true, and not saying it's right, I'm just saying that the odds are that that's how it is. Besides, many people already see us as "crossing lines" in expressing exactly the same things that our hetero counterparts can freely express (and, indeed, are rewarded for doing so with jokes and camaraderie), so I personally feel that it's in our best interests not to step up the very edges of those lines and give people "proof" that we're just what they think we are.
This is, of course, only my personal approach, and not one to which I would presume to confine you. I only articulate it here to explain the motivations behind my previous cautionary post. Indeed, I did search a few pages of the posts that preceded yours, and found yours to be closer to "the line" than anyone else's. If someone else's post had been leading the pushing of the line and yours had been more conservative, I would not have mentioned it. And, had your post ended up being contested, I would have defended it tooth and nail and hung my forum membership on the debate, as I have been known to do before (once upon a time when we were criticized for posting exactly the same kinds of things as the heteros).
diamondlil
Mice! They taste so nice!
One thing I find interesting, is that my taste is definately maturing. Younger eye-candy just doesn't light up my radar screen. I remember a discussion with a straight male friend that continuing to lust after people who are in the age-range that you could be their parent was IMO just weird.
RobbiesCornField
Bring it on.
I do understand where your coming from. My only thoughts were that if we can mention one night stand's on a family forum, that a picture like that wouldn't be as questionable. I was already well prepared in the event that someone did protest to take it down immediately, and without a fight.
desertanimal
2003 UB313
It is a common misconception that gay men are not manly or dominant. Certainly, not all of them are, but plenty of them are. Certainly, not all hetero men are "manly" or "dominant."
Some people like it all one way. Some people like to trade off. I think this characterizes hetero relationships as much as it does homosexual ones. I know some gays who have very strongly gender dichotomous relationships. Mine is relatively egalitarian. I know some heteros who have very strongly gender dichotomous relationships. Some are relatively egalitarian.
sinisterserpents1
Love All, Trust A Few
SnakeAround
Formerly Blutengel
@desertanimal: I know what you mean, but I'd find it difficult to believe that a bi-sexual man would be able to be so masculine and aroused by a female as that guy was, just a feeling... but I guess there are some.
I have dated a bi-sexual guy in the past, he was not dominant or very masculine at all, so it does confirm my feeling about this, though of course it's only one guy. I do have to meet the first gay men which does not 'show signs of it', but apparently the ones that are not 'recognizable' are also the ones who never let others know. (I hope the ' ' show that I'm trying to phrase the sentences respectfully).
I have dated a bi-sexual guy in the past, he was not dominant or very masculine at all, so it does confirm my feeling about this, though of course it's only one guy. I do have to meet the first gay men which does not 'show signs of it', but apparently the ones that are not 'recognizable' are also the ones who never let others know. (I hope the ' ' show that I'm trying to phrase the sentences respectfully).
desertanimal
2003 UB313
I get what you're saying. There are definitely "tells," which we all rely on to put people in boxes, and then there are people who don't fit those. (My god, if you were to go to a "bear" bar, you would mostly see people who do not fit your expectation of what it means to be a gay man!) But I like to raise the point that not all people fit in those boxes, because people who don't fit the un-normal stereotype end up feeling silenced because they aren't seen by others as "normal gay." It seems funny to think of it, but those people who don't *seem* gay but are gay almost have a harder time in some ways because people assume they are not (because they put gay people in a box of too feminine to be a "normal" man for men and too masculine to be a "normal" woman for women). What ends up happening when we box gay people into that stereotype is that gay people who don't fit that stereotype actually have a harder time than gay people who do. For example, no one ever, EVER asks me about my husband when they see my wedding ring, because I fit their stereotype about what a lesbian is. But then, my wife is someone that people *never* know about, and at every Dr.'s appointment, and every new job, and every new person she meets, she is asked about what her husband does for a living, so she has to make an issue of it and say, "I don't have a husband. My wife . . . blah blah blah." She doesn't mind really, but the point is that I have a get-out-of-throwing-it-in-our-face-and-making-it-an-issue card, because you would automatically assume about me and adjust your questions to things like, "And what does your significant other do?" My wife has no such card. So she is forced to choose between lying and sweeping it under the rug or making an overt issue of it EVERY TIME SHE MEETS SOMEONE. And then, we don't have a very gender steroetyped relationship in many ways, but people always assume we do (people always think I'm the one to be afraid of but I am much more tolerant and forgiving and understanding; people think I'm the "strong one" that does the "caretaking," but we trade off with that as necessary). And it's a really interesting paradox to be caught in.
This is a poem written and recited by a woman (her identity--trans, lesbian, stone butch--is unclear) that captures really beautifully both sides of this issue for women. It captures things I have felt but had forgotten because I tend to look forward and not back, and it raises the issues that femme lesbians have to deal with all the time. I can hide from overt challenges a little bit behind my obvious gayness in ways that they cannot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Q7IzwUa_kI (For the record, I don't understand the needing to feel strong in movies or the body issues at the end. I don't need to feel strong anymore and I think the body issues/landmine thing at the end is relevant for a very specific portion of lesbians only. But the rest resonates with many, many lesbians in one way or another. And I have to say, I delight in the bathroom issues. They crack me up. The fact that people can ignore the information they should be getting from my D cups in favor of the information they feel they receive from my haircut just cracks me right up. It is especially my favorite when people leave the bathroom in surprise, only to come back in 15 seconds later, trying to act all nonchalant. OMG. I think it's so funny. Sometimes I want to point out that my "girls" are WAY bigger than theirs! ROFLMAO! But I just smile and don't say anything.)
I'm sure the same types of issues are even more acute for men, who are afforded much less flexibility by society in their expressions of personhood and sexuality than women are. And that is why I raised the issue in the first place. It was not to accuse you of being closed-minded or insensitive, but to give voice (or room for voice) to people who are so often silenced by our stereotypes--in this case, butch, manly, macho gay or bi- men. To remind us all that when we stereotype what it means to be a heterosexual man versus a homosexual man, we challenge all men who don't fit those stereotypes and discourage them from being who they are and ask them to fit themselves into little boxes. It's one thing to say "I like my men like x," and completely another to say, "I was surprised about z because I think heterosexual men are like x and homosexual men are like y." The former does not put boundaries on men; the latter does. I don't want men to tell me that I am not a woman because I don't produce babies and don't stay in the kitchen and I don't sleep with men. I am a woman. I am very womanly in many ways. I decide that. And as a woman, I rightly demand the right partake in defining what womanhood means and I defend the rights of all women to do so and not to be constrained by what men think womanhood should be unless they choose to. And so, I am just as sensitive about women saying things that could be interpreted to be dictating what it is to be a "man." Indeed, men are more constrained by society than women in many ways. So I think if we do not want to be confined to gender stereotypes, we, likewise, cannot confine them to gender steroetypes. I am not saying that you do this in your head, but words can go a long way, especially when they are read by uncritical thinkers. And so, I always like to raise the point, because I think discussion of these issues (and critical thinking about the things we say casually) can have very real consequences, just as a lack of critical thinking about these issues has very real consequences of maintaining the confining status quo.
(As an aside, I understand that you feel a bi- man could not be as attracted to you as this one apparently was, but I would question your ability to judge that unless you identify as bi-. I don't identify as bi-, and I don't personally understand how a person could be powerfully attracted to both sexes, but hey, the serious heteros I know don't understand how I'm not attracted to men and I don't understand how it is that they are attracted to the opposite sex, so I think it unreasonable to place expectations on people unless they're saying that they are what you are. Because who you are is the only thing you can really understand.)
This is a poem written and recited by a woman (her identity--trans, lesbian, stone butch--is unclear) that captures really beautifully both sides of this issue for women. It captures things I have felt but had forgotten because I tend to look forward and not back, and it raises the issues that femme lesbians have to deal with all the time. I can hide from overt challenges a little bit behind my obvious gayness in ways that they cannot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Q7IzwUa_kI (For the record, I don't understand the needing to feel strong in movies or the body issues at the end. I don't need to feel strong anymore and I think the body issues/landmine thing at the end is relevant for a very specific portion of lesbians only. But the rest resonates with many, many lesbians in one way or another. And I have to say, I delight in the bathroom issues. They crack me up. The fact that people can ignore the information they should be getting from my D cups in favor of the information they feel they receive from my haircut just cracks me right up. It is especially my favorite when people leave the bathroom in surprise, only to come back in 15 seconds later, trying to act all nonchalant. OMG. I think it's so funny. Sometimes I want to point out that my "girls" are WAY bigger than theirs! ROFLMAO! But I just smile and don't say anything.)
I'm sure the same types of issues are even more acute for men, who are afforded much less flexibility by society in their expressions of personhood and sexuality than women are. And that is why I raised the issue in the first place. It was not to accuse you of being closed-minded or insensitive, but to give voice (or room for voice) to people who are so often silenced by our stereotypes--in this case, butch, manly, macho gay or bi- men. To remind us all that when we stereotype what it means to be a heterosexual man versus a homosexual man, we challenge all men who don't fit those stereotypes and discourage them from being who they are and ask them to fit themselves into little boxes. It's one thing to say "I like my men like x," and completely another to say, "I was surprised about z because I think heterosexual men are like x and homosexual men are like y." The former does not put boundaries on men; the latter does. I don't want men to tell me that I am not a woman because I don't produce babies and don't stay in the kitchen and I don't sleep with men. I am a woman. I am very womanly in many ways. I decide that. And as a woman, I rightly demand the right partake in defining what womanhood means and I defend the rights of all women to do so and not to be constrained by what men think womanhood should be unless they choose to. And so, I am just as sensitive about women saying things that could be interpreted to be dictating what it is to be a "man." Indeed, men are more constrained by society than women in many ways. So I think if we do not want to be confined to gender stereotypes, we, likewise, cannot confine them to gender steroetypes. I am not saying that you do this in your head, but words can go a long way, especially when they are read by uncritical thinkers. And so, I always like to raise the point, because I think discussion of these issues (and critical thinking about the things we say casually) can have very real consequences, just as a lack of critical thinking about these issues has very real consequences of maintaining the confining status quo.
(As an aside, I understand that you feel a bi- man could not be as attracted to you as this one apparently was, but I would question your ability to judge that unless you identify as bi-. I don't identify as bi-, and I don't personally understand how a person could be powerfully attracted to both sexes, but hey, the serious heteros I know don't understand how I'm not attracted to men and I don't understand how it is that they are attracted to the opposite sex, so I think it unreasonable to place expectations on people unless they're saying that they are what you are. Because who you are is the only thing you can really understand.)
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SnakeAround
Formerly Blutengel
Thanks for your insights in the world of gay people, I really learned something from your post. And indeed, it was only a couple of years ago that I realized that one cannot understand everything because everyone has his or her own set of what is logic or feels logic. And indeed, I as a hetero cannot imagine that a lesbian really does not feel attracted to men or that a gay man really does not feel anything seeing a gorgeous female. Maybe that is because even many hetero females won't say no to experiment with a female some time, though almost any hetero man really objects the idea of experimenting with a man. Maybe they are less prone to admit they would, if I think about what you say.
Tracee
Grrrl
GOOD GIRL!!!!And here he is, my one night stand I could not resist
......I've got my eyes on another one now. Welllll he lives a lot closer than the guy I showed you the picture of... What's a girl to do?!
Tracee
Grrrl
See I'm right at that age where I'm completely LOST now. I'm 26 and deliberately going for older men because those younger than me have , so far at least, been complete babies - and that's worse than no fun, it's been soul destroying.
But darn it if that 22 year old didn't flash me his pecs and I was right there, I normally wait and get to know them but thought to hell with it - which I wouldn't have done with an older guy. I do feel like a cradle snatcher because we have nothing in common whatsoever.
A 41 year old guy who has an amazing body is trying his luck currently, but as much as I think I'd prefer an older man, and his physique easily rivals my 22 year olds, there's no 'pull' there. Am I a cougar in the making I wonder :laugh:
Tracee
Grrrl
Lovely!!! Have never seen him before, presume he is an actor?
Vince Vaughan, bless him, needs to UN-let himself go. He almost had Jennifer Aniston!!!!
Tracee
Grrrl
A GREAT post. As a straight woman, I feel like I'd be delighted to tell people with a smile, "I don't have a husband; my wife on the other hand..." however I'm not sure I could say that if I actually was in that position. Mind you whenever I go out with my cousin blokes rally round to buy us drinks, assuming I'm "the feminine one" and I very rarely both to correct them.
Hopefully she is more bored of saying it and doesn't get upset by it? Any stone-agers who were taken aback I hope would not have time to think and react negatively.
kathylove
Pragmatic & Logical
desertanimal
"I get what you're saying. There are definitely "tells," which we all rely on to put people in boxes, and then there are people who don't fit those. (My god, if you were to go to a "bear" bar, you would mostly see people who do not fit your expectation of what it means to be a gay man!) But I like to raise the point that not all people fit in those boxes, because people who don't fit the un-normal stereotype end up feeling silenced because they aren't seen by others as "normal gay." It seems funny to think of it, but those people who don't *seem* gay but are gay almost have a harder time in some ways because people assume they are not (because they put gay people in a box of too feminine to be a "normal" man for men and too masculine to be a "normal" woman for women)..."
Yes, thanks for the insights and your thoughts! Everything you said makes a lot of sense. But most straight people would never stop to think about it that carefully - or have an insight into the thoughts and lifestyles of gay men and women.
And I think you are very correct about only being able to experience life through your own perspective, and only being able to TRY to understand it through the eyes of others. I can't really imagine being attracted to women, and I can LESS imagine being attracted to both men AND women. It is strange to think that one can maybe be TOO gay or not gay ENOUGH to fit into that society. But I really shouldn't be at all surprised, considering what I have seen of other human groups and subcultures.
Thanks for the post!
"I get what you're saying. There are definitely "tells," which we all rely on to put people in boxes, and then there are people who don't fit those. (My god, if you were to go to a "bear" bar, you would mostly see people who do not fit your expectation of what it means to be a gay man!) But I like to raise the point that not all people fit in those boxes, because people who don't fit the un-normal stereotype end up feeling silenced because they aren't seen by others as "normal gay." It seems funny to think of it, but those people who don't *seem* gay but are gay almost have a harder time in some ways because people assume they are not (because they put gay people in a box of too feminine to be a "normal" man for men and too masculine to be a "normal" woman for women)..."
Yes, thanks for the insights and your thoughts! Everything you said makes a lot of sense. But most straight people would never stop to think about it that carefully - or have an insight into the thoughts and lifestyles of gay men and women.
And I think you are very correct about only being able to experience life through your own perspective, and only being able to TRY to understand it through the eyes of others. I can't really imagine being attracted to women, and I can LESS imagine being attracted to both men AND women. It is strange to think that one can maybe be TOO gay or not gay ENOUGH to fit into that society. But I really shouldn't be at all surprised, considering what I have seen of other human groups and subcultures.
Thanks for the post!
diamondlil
Mice! They taste so nice!
Oh I've done the cougar bit in my 30's, great fun and I don't regret it at all, but what I find now is that any man in his 20's I sort of compare to my sons, so there's just no attraction for me there. Mind you I'm in temporary retirement so I'm enjoying not feeling that need or pull right now!